Thursday, September 17, 2015

a rainy day


7 am: Alarm goes off. Cuddle a little deeper under the down comforter (soooo cozy) and then roll out of bed. Rush downstairs and half-heartedly do jumping jacks, burpees, sit-ups, and bicycle crunches. Decide against a second round and half-heartedly do some easy yoga instead. Juno comes down halfway through sun salutation and tries to sit under me while I'm in downward facing dog. Fall on top of her, yell at her, and then go upstairs to wake up Tempe and Helena.
7:30: Cajole Tempe and Helena out of bed by promising to feed them breakfast before doing their hair. Dish up toast and granola, toast and oatmeal, and toast. And then some granola. And then milk. And then two glasses of orange juice. Make them promise to unload the dishwasher when they are done eating.
7:45: Kiss Jason goodbye and have a quick family prayer. Go upstairs and get dressed and make the bed. Look, the master bedroom magically looks neat and tidy now.
8 am: Call down to the girls to see if they're done eating/unloading the dishwasher yet. Find that Tempe and Helena are both sitting on the couch reading. Remind them that I'm not going to drive them to school if they're running late.
8:10: Brush Tempe's hair. Brush Helena's hair (lots of screaming). Brush Juno's hair. 
8:20: Tell Tempe and Helena to get their socks, shoes, and jackets on. Look out the window and realize it's raining harder than I've ever seen before. Promise to drive them to school after all.
8:30: Wake Pearl up. Hover on the covered front steps with Tempe, Helena, Juno, Pearl, and Dylan (next door neighbor) for a few minutes, trying to decide if the rain will slow at all in the next few minutes. Dash out to the car. Get soaked while trying to buckle Juno and Pearl into their carseats.
8:35: Drive the kids to school. Come home. Get soaked while unbuckling Juno and Pearl.
8:40: Taylor arrives.
8:45: Feed Pearl breakfast. Do the breakfast dishes while she's eating. Give Juno and Taylor washable markers and let them draw on the glass french doors in the kitchen. Scarf down a piece of peanut butter toast. Share the crust with Pearl.
9 am: Give Juno and Taylor each a letters worksheet with watercolor paints and stickers. Make bread dough. Make granola while bread dough is rising. Wipe watercolor paint off the counters.
9:20: Read stack of library books on the couch. Allow Pearl to carry the crust of the toast around the house to keep her happy. 
9:40: Start the craft I've planned for the day: four seasons trees using the kids' hands as the trees. Trace around Juno and Taylor's hands four times each. Give them gluesticks, construction paper, and tissue paper to decorate the trees for each season. Give Pearl a cracker to keep her from crying about not getting a gluestick. Bravely sprinkle sugar over the glue on the winter trees. Spill some on the floor. 
9:30: Vacuum the living room and great room. Remember the bread dough and go to the kitchen to shape it. While I'm in the kitchen, remember the granola in the oven and get it out before it burns (whew).
10 am: Take the kids upstairs and tell them they can jump on the couch in my room while I do the laundry. Start first of three loads of laundry. Put the bread in the oven.
10:15: Bundle all three kids up in socks, rainboots, and raincoats and give them umbrellas. Open the garage and let them play in the rain while I sit on an old chair that I meant to take to DI a year ago. Hey, this old chair is kind of nice to have in the garage. Maybe I'll keep it after all.
10:30: Rush into the house to take the bread out of the oven just in the nick of time.
11 am: After 45 minutes of playing in the rain/fixing their bikes with my tools, we finally come inside. Turn on fire and read more library books.
11:20: Let's have lunch! Give everyone lunch and run upstairs to switch the laundry. 
11:40: Lunch is over. Vacuum the living room and great room.
11:45: Hand out toys from the playroom. Try to put one away and accidentally pull the entire shelving unit off the wall. All the toys in the playroom are now on the floor of the playroom. Close the door so no one can get into it. Break up fight between Juno and Taylor over their toys.
12 pm: Break up fight between Juno and Taylor over their toys.
12:15: Put Pearl down for an early nap.
12:30: Break up fight between Juno and Taylor over their toys.
12:40: Rousing game of Uno with Juno and Taylor. Force Juno to practice her speech sounds every time she plays a number card. Find that allowing her, nay, encouraging her to say "poop" and "peepee" is a great way to get her to practice the p sound.
1 pm: Read more library books.
1:15: Taylor's mom is here. Bye, Taylor! See you tomorrow! Remember to find her cup and art project, but forget to send her lunchbox home.
1:20: Turn on the tv for Juno. Scarf down a quick PB&H sandwich and a handful of peanuts.
1:30: Settle down on the couch with the computer. I'm going to find a recipe for an ice cream cake for Tempe's birthday, find some great Christmas gift ideas for the kids, and do some travel research for a trip I'm planning.
1:40: Binge watch 2 1/2 episodes of Parenthood instead.
3:25: Tell Juno to turn off the tv and switch the laundry. Realize that it is once again raining and school just got out. Wake up Pearl and get soaked trying to buckle Juno and Pearl into their carseats.
3:30: Park half a block from school and wait for Tempe and Helena. And wait. And wait. And wait. Finally see them. Helena throws backpack in car and asks to go to friend's house. I say yes.
3:50: Offer each child a graham cracker for an after school snack. Allow Pearl to wander around the house with hers to keep her happy.
3:55: Send Tempe to Activity Days. Remind her to take her umbrella. 
4 pm: Start dinner (creamy chicken and wild rice soup). Hold Pearl, who is very fussy, on my lap while I talk to my mom on the phone for 15 minutes. Pearl simultaneously wants to be held and to sit with the cat and is very upset she can't do both.
4:45: Tempe comes home. Tell her to start her homework. Switch the laundry. Do more dinner stuff while Pearl holds on to my legs, crying. Give her a cracker to keep her happy.
5 pm: Helena arrives home mad because she had to walk (it wasn't raining this time). Allow her to change into her pajamas and lay in her bed for 15 minutes.
5:15: Convince Helena to come downstairs and start her homework. Allow Tempe to type her spelling words and count it for both spelling practice and typing practice. Wrap a present for my niece. Package up some bread and soup for my next door neighbors.
5:30: It's raining again. Get soaked while taking dinner next door. Jason arrives home. Put him in charge of Pearl (crying again). Vacuum the living room and great room.
5:45: Eat dinner. Tell Tempe she can't hide a book on her lap because we want to be able to talk to each other as a family. Only one thing spills tonight!
6:10: Clean up dinner. Tell Tempe, Helena, and Juno to get shoes and jackets on. Pearl also tries to put her shoes on and cries when I won't help.
6:20: Take Tempe, Helena, and Juno to my niece's birthday party. Pearl cries when she can't come (she has a cold).
6:30-7:30: Tell Tempe, Helena, and Juno that they can only have one piece of cake, not to jump on their aunt and uncle's furniture, they can't go outside in the rain, ok fine, they can go outside in the rain but they can't come back in, ok fine, they can come back in if they take off their shoes, etc.
7:45: Get home and start bedtime. Put Juno to bed on the couch in my room because Pearl is already asleep. Jason reads Percy Jackson to Tempe and Helena while I help them pick out clothes.
8 pm: Go downstairs to make lunch. There's still one serving of soup in the pot on the stove but no tupperware containers. Perfect, I can put it in Tempe's thermos and send it to school for her. Hear a giant crash and run upstairs to discover Juno fell off the toilet in the bathroom. Put her back to bed on the couch in my room and sit in the hallway reading Harry Potter.
8:25: Go back downstairs to finish packing lunches. Put Tempe's homework folder in her backpack. Put Helena's homework folder in her backpack. 
8:30: Binge watch The Mindy Project. Send some texts concerning Tempe's family birthday party re: when to have it?
10 pm: Get ready for bed and read Harry Potter under the down comforter (sooooo cozy). 
10:40: Fall asleep listening to the rain on the roof. Not a bad day.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

disasters in marriage

We've been married for 10 years.




And we have four kids.
And we have not had a successful couple only getaway in all that time.
Notice I say successful?
We have gone away for the weekend three times in ten years.
Each time worse than the time before.

Attempt #1: A few months before our fifth anniversary. I scored a room at the Anniversary Inn in Salt Lake for super cheap, so we decided to celebrate early. We had limited means and so we decided to skip dinner at a nice restauraunt. Instead we went to McDonalds, the worst of the worst. After "dinner", we went back to the hotel and enjoyed our room. It was kitschy. It was fun. It was different. The bed seemed relatively comfortable.
About an hour after we fell asleep, something woke us up. The people in the room next door were also enjoying their bed... loudly. Yeah, that's understandable at a place like the Anniversary Inn. But it went on.... and on.... and on.... and on. So. Loud. We actually ended up leaving at three in the morning. 

Attempt #2: Jason's sweet parents felt so bad for us about our first getaway that they gave us a night at a hotel later that year. Being procrastinators, we didn't get around to using it until right before it expired, at which point we had a six month old baby in a body cast. I was a zombie during Juno's time in her body cast because she woke up every hour on the hour of every night of the entire six weeks she was in her cast. Our night at the hotel was no different, so I spent much of the night struggling to nurse a pink block of cement while also trying to keep her from crying constantly and disturbing the other hotel guests. Not terrible, but really the furthest thing from a relaxing night without kids.

Attempt #3: Earlier this year we celebrated our 10th anniversary. Plans were made. A restaurant was chosen (an expensive restaurant). I was again a zombie because I again had a baby that was a terrible sleeper (this time it was 11 month old Pearl, who still woke up 2-3 times a night). I wanted nothing more than a solid night's sleep with a leisurely morning spent lounging in bed, watching tv, and eating a delicious breakfast delivered right to our door. What could go wrong?
Dinner tasted good. The restaurant was fun. The hotel was nice. 
But later, after we fell asleep, one of us got sick and was up for several hours... and the other couldn't fall back asleep until after four in the morning. Then breakfast was delivered at 8:30. So I ended up with even less sleep on my kid-free getaway than I did at home.

After our 10th annniversary disaster, we promised ourselves a do-over. Nothing fancy this time--low pressure--just the two of us, relaxing and spending time together. Dare we make a fourth attempt??